It’s not very often that I sit down and do a “spur of the moment “ blog post, I was left in the state of confusion or uncertainty when my three and half year old son has been asked the same question which I listened for my entire life. “Are you going to be short heighted (same as your mom and dad)”. Im short and I will always be short women and nothing can change that. You might think that I am probably the most shameless and shallow person you have ever met, because being a short girl just 5 feet never bothered me, unlike most girl or women who find it difficult to be with their flaws confidently and starts thinking how to deal with being short, I welcomed each and every negative comment very patiently.
Lots of people teased me about my height stating that you will not be able to wear good clothes as those will not suit on you or you will not be confident whole your life as people will not have confidence on you again because of your personality etc.etc. But I grew up believing that even being a short girl I am the most beautiful and confident girl and that’s all because of people around me who always had trust in me (I am blessed to have that kind of family and friends with me ) they drilled it in my head almost every day. That you can be as talented as you want to be, and those biological numbers are nothing but just your initial fear of rejection.
Life being a short girl
I have been petite all my life ,my earliest memory of primary school in having to stand at the front of the class line at assembly whenever we had to line up(sometimes I have been caught because of my unpolished shoes.sadly). It was always according to height and I was always at the front being a short girl.(I use to enjoy that a lot LOL).
As I grew up a little when other girls around me were shooting up. I waited patiently for my growth spurt, I don’t remember if I ever felt negative for my height.
Being a short girl or women is a magical journey that I have been blessed with, but having to explain this to others still the toughest part of this journey.
Now I am 36 and a mother of two little handsome boys. Every moment with my little ones is like – I am born again as a child, I am living my childhood with them, those toys, rhymes, candies and those favorite cartoon channels(Specially doremon). I am loving everything again, but one thing which I don’t want to pass onto my little boys is that same unwanted, nonsense, stupid question of about being short and how to deal with being short.
I am surprised(literally) how a little average heightened baby can be judged as a short heighted person in future and if that will be the case what’s wrong in that, should he feel ashamed on being vertically challenged, should I feel ashamed of myself for not being tall ? Should i hate my height?
The first time this question bothered me and broke me. When I visited my mom home few months back and was having lunch with my mom, suddenly our doorbell rang and my aunt came to meet me ( she is my mom’s friend and neighbor too )
I was happy to meet her as there are lots of childhood memories with my neighbors with whom I spent more than 25 years of my life, then I offered her tea and snacks and started discussing our casual random childhood topics, suddenly our topic of conversation turned to shot girls/boys when my 3.5 years baby enter the room , My aunt who were sitting next to me said- “I think he will be short heighted, you should start introducing some stretching exercise to your son else he will also remain short as his mom and dad, and to conclude her remark she cracked a joke ( with smile ) that people will love to put him in their pocket being tiny.
I rolled my eyes, gave her half smile, nodded and walked away. I thought to myself “Why it is so difficult for the people to allow someone to be with the fact and accept the truth or to celebrate their personality in every possible way “.
how to deal with being short
Yes, I am short compared to some and tall compared to others. Even though I am short I wanted to touch the sky.
I don’t understand why I am so much associated with my personality ( including my height), but I can’t explain my love for myself to a person or society who doesn’t even want to get it.
I recently read an article where a tall mother of vertically challenged kids said: “ she hoped her kids would not be defined by their height”. How can you not be defined by being short when that is what you are? How do i hate my height when my skin complexion, my features, my essence everything altogether makes me what I am. We should be proud of our self in each and every definition. I can’t help being short, but there is no reason why it should bother me unless I let it.
In my own journey to self-acceptance and self-love I have come to love and appreciate my stature always and the same I want to pass on to my boys, even if they become short they will never say i hate my height or complexion or body type etc.etc, I will never allowed them to go into height depression or any other, because we are the society they are the society and they will make the society no one else. But until everyone have the confidence to love them the way they are and not letting anyone else have a vote for them, it will continue to persist, continue to tear, continue to pit someone in a hole of height depression.
I am sure someone will call me “short and beautiful girl” again. To this, My answer will be-
“Thanks but just say I am a beautiful girl.”